Way back in 2014, a mere month after walking the stage to receive my PhD in Medical Anthropology, I traveled to Louisville, KY to attend a birth doula training with the brilliant Robin Elise Weiss. Since then I’ve attended more than 200 doula client births and learned so much along the way. This is the story of how I became a doula.
When I got pregnant during graduate school (not something I recommend btw), I voraciously read everything I could about pregnancy, birth, and postpartum. I could not get enough, and I even had professors sending me articles about how babies learn language before they are born. Naturally I scheduled my German conversation course for the spring semester while I was pregnant. By the time I neared the end graduate school I’d had 2 children and wasn’t sure I wanted to be an academic. That was when the idea to become a doula really started to take hold.
I started in 2013 by networking with other doulas in Evansville, and oh my goodness they were all soo nice to me. They invited me to a “doula night” at one of their houses where they talked business, trainings, & all things doula. One of them even had a placenta in their freezer, and I knew these were my people. I was hooked. I went to the training in June 2014, and have been taking clients ever since then. None of those doulas I met that night are still taking clients, which speaks so much to how challenging this job can be, especially the unexpected bits of it.
The Unexpected Bits
I didn’t expect to need to run my own business. I know that sounds naïve, even to me now, but it is the truth. I wanted to help birthing families sure, but finding clients, building & maintaining a website, setting up the proper legal paperwork, social media, paying taxes, networking, and all that jazz were not part of the thought process of getting started. I may have had a PhD, but I had much to learn about business. I’m happy to say that I feel much more confident now, though the imposter syndrome does sneak in occasionally.
The challenge of life on call was not something I was wholly prepared for in the beginning. As a birth doula, I have to be ready to leave my life for a couple days with sometimes not much warning. I have to be willing to miss holidays and plays and family events to go be with my clients. When my kids were little, the biggest challenge was having childcare ready at any moment of the day for possibly an entire month of 24/7 on-call time. This is the part that I always talk to people thinking about becoming a doula about, because not everyone has the resources to be able to do that. The reality of how much energy being a doula takes also almost always has new doulas re-thinking how much they charge for their services, though that is a topic for another time.
The best unexpected bits have been the amazing connections that I’ve been able to make with clients and their families. I’m forever grateful to be a part of some of the most memorable moments of their lives. There are so many families that I’ve had the chance to meet and be part of that I would never have met otherwise. That is something so beautiful about this job and I’ll never take it for granted. Though it does sometimes make it challenging to walk through a crowd without someone yelling my name and getting random hugs. (BONUS!!)
Learning
I’ve continued learning from some of the best doulas around the world, and I’m going to keep learning probably forever, because that’s just my style. I’ve gotten amazing doula agency business advice from Jessica English. I took a brilliant postpartum doula training from Jen Chandlee. I continue to learn from Ann Grauer, who also trained the 2 other postpartum doulas on my team. I am learning about leadership in the doula world from Melissa Harley & Nikia Lawson all the time too. I’m sure this year will be a huge one of learning, as I step into the role of President at DONA International.
I’m asked all the time about how to become a doula. This is my story. I started with DONA International, and have worked hard to keep learning and growing as a doula. I have an abundance mindset, and I honestly feel like that has helped bridge so much learning and connection for me. It is also why I’m passionate that more people in Evansville should learn to be doulas too! I love talking to new doulas and am HAPPY when more doulas are trained here. I started Doula Group of Evansville so that more families could be supported by doulas and more doulas could feel supported by each other.
Ever thought of becoming a doula?
Becoming a doula has been one of the best decisions that I’ve ever made. It hasn’t been easy, but it has honestly been more rewarding that I ever could have imagined. If you’re thinking about becoming a doula, please feel free to reach out to talk to me. I will continue to pass on the kindness shown to me by the doulas here back in 2014 by always being willing to share my experience with others who might be interested in traveling this path too.
