Doula Love – Doula Group of Evansville

Black Birth Matters

This Black History Month I want to celebrate the 3 amazing black doulas on our team who are making history every single day! Tamika, Jessica, & Norma are 3 of the kindest humans you will ever meet. All 3 are birth doulas who love serving all kinds of families, but definitely have a very special heart to be able to serve families from the Black Community especially. We know how important culturally congruent care can be to all families, but especially here in the US where maternal mortality is 3-4 times higher for black birthing families than everyone else, and where racism is a daily fact of life.

These 3 doulas are all so very different, but the one thing they have in common is a personal understanding of the black experience here in Evansville. Their experiences help shape the type of doulas they are with all of their clients of course. Their compassion for the struggle of navigating the healthcare system all while worrying that whoever is in charge of your care might be judging you based on your skin color is impeccable. We LOVE the questions that they ask and their approach to helping families, and I learn from every single conversation that I get the chance to have with each of them.

I celebrate these doulas because of their bravery and knowing that this work is about so much more than representation. The human connection is what doula work is all about, and these 3 get it on a cellular level. They are proud black doulas here serving our community and raising beautiful children in a sometimes very challenging place.

I asked one of them what was hard about living here, and her reply was, “I think its because the racism is hidden, so its harder to decide who is trustworthy.” That was a gut punch of a statement, but of course a sentiment shared by many families of color. These doulas get it, because they live it. The best part though, “that we have such a great group of doulas supporting each other who all get it.”

We see you Tamika, Jessica, & Norma out here being the change you want to see in the world. Thank you for trusting this group to be part of your doula community. We appreciate your perspective and work so very much, and are here to support you in every way we can.

Becoming a Doula

Way back in 2014, a mere month after walking the stage to receive my PhD in Medical Anthropology, I traveled to Louisville, KY to attend a birth doula training with the brilliant Robin Elise Weiss. Since then I’ve attended more than 200 doula client births and learned so much along the way. This is the story of how I became a doula.

When I got pregnant during graduate school (not something I recommend btw), I voraciously read everything I could about pregnancy, birth, and postpartum. I could not get enough, and I even had professors sending me articles about how babies learn language before they are born. Naturally I scheduled my German conversation course for the spring semester while I was pregnant. By the time I neared the end graduate school I’d had 2 children and wasn’t sure I wanted to be an academic. That was when the idea to become a doula really started to take hold.

I started in 2013 by networking with other doulas in Evansville, and oh my goodness they were all soo nice to me. They invited me to a “doula night” at one of their houses where they talked business, trainings, & all things doula. One of them even had a placenta in their freezer, and I knew these were my people. I was hooked. I went to the training in June 2014, and have been taking clients ever since then. None of those doulas I met that night are still taking clients, which speaks so much to how challenging this job can be, especially the unexpected bits of it.

The Unexpected Bits

I didn’t expect to need to run my own business. I know that sounds naïve, even to me now, but it is the truth. I wanted to help birthing families sure, but finding clients, building & maintaining a website, setting up the proper legal paperwork, social media, paying taxes, networking, and all that jazz were not part of the thought process of getting started. I may have had a PhD, but I had much to learn about business. I’m happy to say that I feel much more confident now, though the imposter syndrome does sneak in occasionally.

The challenge of life on call was not something I was wholly prepared for in the beginning. As a birth doula, I have to be ready to leave my life for a couple days with sometimes not much warning. I have to be willing to miss holidays and plays and family events to go be with my clients. When my kids were little, the biggest challenge was having childcare ready at any moment of the day for possibly an entire month of 24/7 on-call time. This is the part that I always talk to people thinking about becoming a doula about, because not everyone has the resources to be able to do that. The reality of how much energy being a doula takes also almost always has new doulas re-thinking how much they charge for their services, though that is a topic for another time.

The best unexpected bits have been the amazing connections that I’ve been able to make with clients and their families. I’m forever grateful to be a part of some of the most memorable moments of their lives. There are so many families that I’ve had the chance to meet and be part of that I would never have met otherwise. That is something so beautiful about this job and I’ll never take it for granted. Though it does sometimes make it challenging to walk through a crowd without someone yelling my name and getting random hugs. (BONUS!!)

Learning

I’ve continued learning from some of the best doulas around the world, and I’m going to keep learning probably forever, because that’s just my style. I’ve gotten amazing doula agency business advice from Jessica English. I took a brilliant postpartum doula training from Jen Chandlee. I continue to learn from Ann Grauer, who also trained the 2 other postpartum doulas on my team. I am learning about leadership in the doula world from Melissa Harley & Nikia Lawson all the time too. I’m sure this year will be a huge one of learning, as I step into the role of President at DONA International.

I’m asked all the time about how to become a doula. This is my story. I started with DONA International, and have worked hard to keep learning and growing as a doula. I have an abundance mindset, and I honestly feel like that has helped bridge so much learning and connection for me. It is also why I’m passionate that more people in Evansville should learn to be doulas too! I love talking to new doulas and am HAPPY when more doulas are trained here. I started Doula Group of Evansville so that more families could be supported by doulas and more doulas could feel supported by each other.

Ever thought of becoming a doula?

Becoming a doula has been one of the best decisions that I’ve ever made. It hasn’t been easy, but it has honestly been more rewarding that I ever could have imagined. If you’re thinking about becoming a doula, please feel free to reach out to talk to me. I will continue to pass on the kindness shown to me by the doulas here back in 2014 by always being willing to share my experience with others who might be interested in traveling this path too.

Welcome Birth Doula Jessica Baxter!!

We are pleased to announce the arrival of the one and only birth doula Jessica Baxter to our team!!! This small and mighty doula has been trained by two different organizations (DONA International & National Black Doula Association) and is already on the approved list at The Women’s Hospital in Newburgh. She’s ready and excited to start serving clients here with this team of doulas behind her.

Jessica Baxter, birth doula

In Her Words:

“I am a birth doula currently working on full certification . I was born and raised in Evansville and had 2 amazing boys and a very supportive spouse to match. I have over 12 years experience as a Certified Nursing Assistant and 5 years as a Patient Service Coordinator at Deaconess Chancellor Center for Radiation Oncology. Becoming a doula has always been a dream of mine since I was a child. After having children my passion elevated. With my own medical experience I’ve had with my personal births I felt the need to become an advocate for my community. I am a loving and compassionate birth doula who provides emotional, physical and educational support in order to help families have a safe, memorable and empowering birthing experience.”

Why did you become a birth doula?

“I wanted to become a doula to advocate for my community, especially because I know some mothers are too scared to speak up & the black mortality rate is terrible. I want to provide services especially to young black mothers who have no support or the funding to educate themselves about their options.”

What do you like about living in Evansville?

“My favorite thing about living in Evansville is my community. Where I grew up everyone knew everyone and it made it easy to lend a helping hand when needed. I couldn’t go 2 miles without someone calling my mother telling them where they saw me riding my bike.”

What does a typical Saturday look like for you?

“Saturdays after cooking a big breakfast for my family. I go to the gym then spend time with my family. ”

Teamwork Makes the Dream Work!!

We are especially excited that Jessica is joining our team to add more black doula magic because we know that parents love to have doulas who not only look like them, but who also relate to all their experience on a personal level. Jessica is exceedingly kind and has a true heart for service. She has an infectious giggle and asks great questions. She’s also extremely knowledgeable about how to navigate the medical system, which is a VERY valuable skill for a doula to have! She is available to start taking clients now with due dates of May 2022 or later. We would love to help you set up an interview with Jessica so you can chat about her joining your birth team.

Doula Investment

We know that choosing to add a doula to your birth or postpartum team is a pretty big investment for most families, but you won’t regret it! From the time you hire your birth doula all the way through your 4th trimester postpartum, a doula can be there to help you every step of the way. Here are three ways your doula investment pays off for you:

“Is this normal?”

Pregnancy brings a whole lot of aches, pains, and questions about your changing body as you grow another human inside of it. Once you decide to make that doula investment your services begin right then. You get your doula’s phone number and can call or text them with ANY worries or questions you might have. We promise ZERO judgement for any questions, because we’ve probably already heard most of them before too.

We also know that the internet can be an overwhelming place for pregnant people. Not only can you ask your doula all your personal pregnancy, birth, & postpartum questions, but we also have an online classroom for our clients. Our classroom is filled with links, handouts, & even coloring pages that are helpful. We filter the internet, so you don’t have to worry about getting advice from random groups of possibly uninformed fellow parents.

Birth options

Contrary to popular belief, doulas don’t think everyone should have the same kind of birth. Investing in doula services means having someone on your team that wants to know YOU and your specific requests. Doulas invest in your experience, because that is our job on your team! Research has shown that doulas actually spend more time with you than anyone else on your birth team by the way, and that’s a pretty big deal. So whether you want to go without pain medication or want your epidural ASAP, a doula can still help you know all of your options. Doulas start getting to know your preferences during pregnancy and help you move through all those decisions during the entire process of bringing your baby earth-side.

Postpartum resources

Once your baby arrives, your doula doesn’t just ditch you! We have a ton of resources for families once you’re holding that baby. Whether you are looking for lactation information, local professionals that can help you physically recover, or even someone to come help out around the house while you shower, we can doula that. Sure our online classroom has resources for you, but sometimes you just need someone to come over and check on just you. Your birth doula will do just that.

Postpartum doulas are a newer thing here in Evansville, Indiana, but we are here to tell you that this is one doula investment that is going to knock your socks off too. A postpartum doula gives physical, emotional, & information support to families in the 4th trimester. Want someone to come do the dishes, fold your laundry, & give you non-judgmental feeding advice while never asking to hold your baby? That’s what a postpartum doula does.

You’re worth it too!

We know that the price-tag for doula services can leave you with sticker shock. We get it. We hope that this blog post has helped explain a bit of what you are going to get for your doula investment. No two client experiences are going to ever look exactly the same, and that is honestly a great thing. We want to help you have the best experience possible from the time you hire your doula until well after you cuddle your baby for the first time. Your doula will be with you every step of the way as much as you want them to be. The experience of bringing your baby into this world is one that will be with you forever, and hiring a doula who is entirely focused on you means investing in your well-being. We know you’re worth it, and we’d be happy to talk to you about how we might be able to help your family.

Postpartum Support

We want to support you without judgement. We want to help you find solutions that work for your family.

4th trimester support: literal and virtual

**This post contains affiliate links, and we may get a small commission if you click through and make a purchase.

Virtual Support

Do you know who to call when you are having trouble getting baby to calm down? Would you love to have a person who knows lots of different tricks and methods and who will listen to you without judgement? What if you had someone calling to check on you as often as you need to answer your questions and reassure you that you’re doing a great job? Postpartum support is something we love to do to help families, especially right now in this isolating pandemic.

Our Virtual Postpartum Package is set up to provide extra postpartum support to families during the time of COVID-19. Postpartum is already a time of introspection and withdrawal while families integrate their new baby into their lives. Currently, parents are faced with increased isolation or fewer social contacts. This package allows families to have access to a supportive, trained doula to process birth stories, explore “what’s normal” with infant care and postpartum recovery. We are happy to provide breastfeeding/bottle feeding/pumping support too! We also have lots of ideas for partners on how to best help and support their birthing partner and baby. We want to help answer your questions regarding sleep, infant development, bonding, baby wearing, soothing, sibling transitions, and navigating relationships. It’s like having a postpartum BFF in your pocket!

This virtual postpartum support package includes

2 one-hour long planning sessions before the baby arrives
6 postpartum support calls (30-60 minutes each)
6 weeks of unlimited email/text postpartum support
Additional time can be purchased for $20/hour if needed

We would love to talk to you about how we can help support your postpartum transition!

Literal Support

Belly Bandit** is all about making products to support your growing family, and I especially love what they have for during the 4th trimester. When you are pregnant your growing baby pushes all of your organs out of the way to make room for your baby. Once that baby isn’t inside there anymore, all of your organs move back into their regular places, though of course not exactly the way they were before you got pregnant. That’s why sometimes even if you weigh the same as before, your clothes might not fit the same way. Your body has still been rearranged. A little extra literal postpartum support can be helpful in your 4th trimester to support your midsection as it retracts. We promise you won’t need it forever, but a little extra literal postpartum support can make a huge difference in the 4th trimester.

This is especially true if you had cesarean surgery to bring your child earth-side. Often after surgery your abdomen can feel very unstable postpartum, and even like you are scared to cough in case your guts are going to spill out. Sorry to be graphic, but if you have had cesarean surgery, then you know! One thing we like to recommend after surgery is a belly band that supports your abdomen, and Belly Bandit** has some very affordable and helpful ones. These can make you feel like your body is going to hold together better and can make a huge difference in recovery.

Support

“I want to be around people that do things. I don’t want to be around people anymore that judge or talk about what people do. I want to be around people that dream and support and do things.”― Amy Poehler

We want to support you without judgement. We want to help you find solutions that work for your family. Contact us today to talk about how we can help support your growing family.

3 Reasons to Hire a Doula

There are a million reasons that people hire a doula, and I’m only listing three here. As I have written before, families deserve support and doulas know a few things that can help you along the way. I love winning over the skeptics. I honestly find that many of the partners who were skeptical in the first place become the doula’s biggest fan when they meet us and see us in action. Birth and postpartum can be challenging; doulas are here to help.

1. Personalized Care

When you hire a doula you are getting a pregnancy, birth, and postpartum BFF who knows all kinds of great information and resources to send you. Doulas get to know you and what you want for your birth and the beginning of your life with a new baby. Sometimes you scour the internet and ask in parent groups online only to find conflicting and confusing advice. A doula can help you sift through that information for what you really need, what is evidence-based, and what will help you toward your own personal goals. We know about about pregnancy, birth, and postpartum.

2. Navigation

Navigating the healthcare system is challenging, and doulas can help with that too. When you hire a doula you get a professional person who knows the trail and can help you navigate the twists and turns. We have worked with many of the local providers in Evansville and Owensboro, and I always joke that we know all the stuff on the secret menu too. What I mean is that knowing the right things to request at the hospital can be extra helpful.

3. Zero Judgement

Hiring a doula means you have a completely non-judgemental person with professional support training and zero personal interest, because that is good and important thing. Doulas are there to serve you without agenda. We know our opinion is irrelevant and we are there to serve the birthing person and their partner. So no matter if you are planning to get an epidural as soon as possible, birthing at home with a midwife, or planning a scheduled cesarean, we can help.

Don’t take my word for it…

“Couples often wonder if they should hire a doula. Maybe your friends had wonderful births and didn’t hire a doula, why should you? All I can say is that doulas are like guides for the trek of labor. They know the landscape, are familiar with the people, sights, and sounds, and know special tricks that just might help you over a peak or through a valley or help facilitate that magical experience that lands firmly in your memory forever. And doulas are there for the whole family. They support partners, too, helping them understand what’s going on, get food, rest, and much needed breaks, and they can also guide partners in better ways to support the laboring parent. You do not have to go it alone. There are others who have trekked before you and know the way. Ask them for help.” (Transformed by Birth by Dr. Britta Bushnell, p136)

The path may be well worn, but sometimes having a doula can make it more enjoyable. Hire a doula to help you move around and suggest position changes. Hire a doula so your partner can go to the bathroom without leaving you alone. Maybe everything medical makes your partner nauseous. If you want someone there to go through it all with you, hire a doula. A doula works for you and nobody else, and that can be invaluable on one of the biggest days of your life.

Families Deserve Support

The continuous support of a doula is supported by science!

The continuous support of a doula is an evidence-based approach to improve outcomes, decrease intervention, & increase satisfaction. Multiple scientific studies and committee opinions have concluded that doulas make a difference! This is an easy to read summary of the evidence if reading academic text isn’t your thing. As a birth doula, I believe that all birthing families deserve support, and not just on the big day.

These are the kinds of support that I have been able to provide for my clients in the past:

Prenatal

Knowing what all the local options are for prenatal care and planning for birth. Calming fears is another thing I do to support my clients in the prenatal period, and this comes in many forms, but most often through education. I also find myself supporting clients prenatally by connecting them with trusted professionals. This can be for all kinds of things including prenatal massage, chiropractic, and more. I also am happy to share my shopping tips when clients are looking for specific things!

Birth

As a doula, during birth I am giving physical support by helping my clients move around. I give hand massages and help keep their gown closed as we walk the halls. I also like to say that I help clients ask more questions about their care. This is part of helping them know what all their options are as well. I like to say that sometimes I help them order off the secret menu of options that aren’t necessarily the norm, but are perfectly fine to request.

One area that I wish I could support birthing families better here is during cesarean surgeries. All families deserve support, and it can be so hard for families when their plans go sideways. In many other places in the United States, they allow doulas in the operating room as a second support person. Doulas are even trained in how to behave inside an operating room, and how to support clients having a cesarean. Doulas are not currently allowed in operating room of all our local hospitals, but maybe we can change that in the future.

Postpartum: direction to proper resources & support!!

The most important thing that I can do for birth doula clients is to direct them to the people who are actual experts in the things that they are dealing with in the moment. If they have questions about breastfeeding, I make sure I send them to an International Board Certified Lactation Consultant. That is just one example, but knowing WHO to ask questions is really important. Breastfeeding is a great example because so many people don’t really understand how little training most physicians have in breastfeeding science, and they end up getting non-evidence-based advice despite best intentions by everyone involved. Part of my job as a doula is helping clients connect to the right people for whatever questions they might have. I don’t always have the answers, but I do make it my business to know who to send you to.

I have not had the capacity to serve postpartum clients this year, but VERY soon, I am going to have an announcement coming, so be on the lookout for that in early 2020!

All families deserve the support of a doula. Part of my job is helping insure you get the right support at the right time from the right people. I’m constantly learning, so I can continue to know the best local and online resources for my clients.

What was the most helpful resource you found to help you after you brought your new baby home?

4cms is NOT Active Labor

Active labor starts at 6 centimeters

Many moons ago, we thought that once you reached 4cms, you were in “active labor” and the pace of your labor should start to pick up and keep going no matter what. In 2010 Zhang and colleagues published a groundbreaking research study that re-examined labor patterns and redefined the beginning of active labor as starting at 6 centimeters! This was a HUGE academic smack-down of the 50+ year standard of Friedman’s curve that defined active labor as starting at 4cms.

Why does it matter? The BIGGEST reason physicians were recommending cesarean section in 2011 was “arrest of labor” or “failure to progress” and apparently they were making the call far too early! You can read more about that whole thing here. After this study was published, the American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology (ACOG) came out with this position paper saying, whoa, let’s slow down this trend in the rise of cesarean births, and even outlined why and how. That position has since be reaffirmed multiple times by ACOG, BUT, I am still not seeing all local providers using this evidence in their practice and I still hear some providers and staff telling people that they are in active labor when they are 4cms. Look, your Aunt Becky might not know the evidence, but you surely hope the people taking care of you are up to date on best practices from 5+ years ago right?

The evidence is clear: If you are 4cms dilated, you are NOT in fact, in active labor. Your labor still has a chance to stall out or even stop. While that is frustrating news if you are in that position, it is also good information to have in case someone might suggest that something is wrong because labor stalls and that you need to DO something about it. Labor takes time and patience. If you are not in active labor yet, leaving is actually an option. (And no, your insurance will not refuse to pay, that is a myth that has been debunked many times over including here.) As long as everyone is safe and healthy, asking for more time to allow your labor to progress without unnecessarily intervening with medicine you might not need is NOT an unreasonable request. Remember to use your B.R.A.I.N (Benefits, Risks, Alternatives, Intuition, & Nothing or Not Now), sometimes that N of NOTHING is important to remember to request!

As your doula, it is my job to know that 6 centimeters is when active labor begins and to help you remember to ask great questions about your care! Getting to 6 cms is typically what takes the longest time, and I help people cope with getting there physically too. I promise I do try not to geek out too much while hanging with clients in labor, but it does happen.

So remember 6 centimeters is when active labor begins!

Things Doulas Know

Unsolicited advice is not my style

I have stopped giving random advice to pregnant people that do not ask for it, essentially for two reasons. The first reason has to do with other people and the second because of me.

Everyone seems to feel entitled to give pregnant people advice, and I do not want to add to the mostly annoying cacophony.

I do not know what it is about pregnancy that makes everyone feel like they need to give you advice and tell you what to do. I know that most everyone really means well, but holy moly it can be really exhausting to be constantly bombarded by people who think they know better than you about what you should do. I won’t even get started on the horror stories that people feel obligated to tell you like they can’t stop the flow of awfulness spewing from their mouths. I have a strict no spreading trauma policy when it comes to speaking to pregnant people, and I highly encourage all clients to tune out any and all negative messages surrounding birth and parenthood, especially while you are extra vulnerable and pumped up full of hormones!

2. I know way more than most people about pregnancy, birth, babies, etc than most people, and I have a tendency to go on and on about it.

I know a ton of really specific and sometimes seemingly random things that can really help people who are navigating pregnancy, planning for their upcoming birth, and getting prepared to take care of a new tiny human too. I am happy to talk about all these things all day long, and I do quite a bit, BUT not everyone wants to hear that. I respect people’s wishes and only expose my super birth geek side when requested.

As a doula and childbirth educator, I have extensively studied pregnancy, birth, and postpartum. I know where to find great evidence-based and unbiased information. I know different comfort techniques to get through labor and delivery. I make sure to keep up on all the local resources for new families in our area including great breastfeeding support services, chiropractors who specialize in the Webster technique, prenatal yoga classes, which physicians will provide parallel care for home birth, support for victims of abuse, stores that sell green baby products, and more. I am seriously committed to life-long learning and I want to help everyone be better connected with the resources and information that they need.

I never want people to feel afraid to ask me questions. I would rather my clients ask me anything rather than sit around worrying or wondering. I make an effort to not overshare or overwhelm people. I am always happy to answer questions, especially for my clients. BUT, I can’t send you answers that you don’t ask for, and I won’t, not because I’m protecting the information, rather because I know it is really hard to sip from a fire hose and it has taken me YEARS to gather all this information that you are trying to digest in 40-ish weeks.

What was the worst unsolicited advice you ever received about birth?

My Goals as Your Doula

As a doula, I listen and follow your lead.

Support you and your family how you want to be supported.

End of list.

Yes, seriously.

As a doula, I listen and follow your lead. If you want information about anything pregnancy or birth related, I am happy to help you find great and unbiased information about all your options. I love answering pregnancy and birth questions, but make a big effort not to inject my opinion into any of it. That is because my opinion about what you should do is pretty much irrelevant. I do not tell people what to do, and completely understand that there is no one right way that works for every birthing family and every situation.

Most people only think of the physical support a doula can offer, and that is certainly part of the job description, but it definitely is not all of it. I hold space for my clients to give them room to think things through and listen to their gut without an audience. I talk through tough decisions and help you get to the root of your desires for your birth. I am an empathetic ear when you are frustrated, excited, anxious, worried, elated, exhausted, etc. I also don’t have ALL the answers, but I am really great at helping people wade through the sea of information out there to find excellent sources and resources too.

In my 5+ years as a doula, my practice has certainly changed, but my #1 goal has always been steadfast, and I don’t ever imagine it will change! I have no agenda for your birth; I only want your family to feel fully supported as you would like to be. I truly strive to check any bias I might carry and leave it outside of the space of your blossoming family.

Would you like to have an extremely knowledgeable, experienced, and compassionate person in your contact list and at your birth? If you said yes, then I would love to talk to you about birth doula services!