Category: pregnancy

Childbirth Education Improves Outcomes

A recent study found that taking a childbirth education class improves birth outcomes. People who took a childbirth education class in this study were three times more likely to have a vaginal birth. Taking a childbirth education class helps improve confidence and skills for coping with labor and delivery. Childbirth education is still important, no matter what kind of birth you are planning.

Group & Private Classes Available

Coping with Labor Naturally is a 3 hour group class that covers the basics you need. The next one will be Saturday February 8th, 9am-noon, and you can sign up here. I will also teach this class in April, July, & October in 2020, so stay tuned if you are interested but not quite ready to sign up yet. This is a great class to bring your partner so they can learn ways to help you in labor. You will also learn which tools to bring with you and which to request when you get to the hospital.

If group classes aren’t your thing, maybe a full private childbirth education class would be right for you. Full private childbirth education classes have 6 hours of private instruction in your home or at my office space. I am a Lamaze certified childbirth educator who only uses evidence-based information. Yes, we will talk about the hee-hee-hoo-hoo breathing, but I cover everything from pregnancy nutrition to birthing positions to postpartum healing. I’m also an experienced birth doula, so I know the ins and outs of the local birthing scene too. This 6 hour class comes with a 96 page spiral-bound book of handouts and articles packed full of information for parents too!

I also have the option of a private 3 hour birth planning only session. This class is easy to customize for your needs and specific situation. I’m happy to cover whichever topics you might be interested in learning about, and help you come up with a plan. This is a great option for people who might be shy or have a very specific situation that needs specific information. This is also a great option for those birthing at home, who might want all the comfort techniques and help writing a transfer birth plan. Contact us directly to schedule a class and get more information!

Online Options

Maybe you’re really busy and would prefer an online option? Lamaze has some great online courses that are inexpensive and evidence-based.

  • FREE Labor Confidence with Lamaze Course here
  • Safe & Healthy Birth: Six Simple Steps here
  • Labor Pain Management: Techniques for Comfort and Coping here
  • Breastfeeding Basics: From Birth to Back to Work here
  • Bringing Home Baby here
  • Vaginal Birth After Cesarean (VBAC): Informed and Ready here

There are other online courses as well that I like, but I will say that most people benefit from some in-person, hands-on learning too. No matter how you choose to learn, taking the time to prepare for childbirth is a GOOD thing to do. Refreshing your knowledge and skills, even if this isn’t your first birth, are also good uses of your time and energy. I’m always happy to recommend books to read too! Childbirth education is important. Childbirth education is helpful. Childbirth education is worth your time.

Families Deserve Support

The continuous support of a doula is supported by science!

The continuous support of a doula is an evidence-based approach to improve outcomes, decrease intervention, & increase satisfaction. Multiple scientific studies and committee opinions have concluded that doulas make a difference! This is an easy to read summary of the evidence if reading academic text isn’t your thing. As a birth doula, I believe that all birthing families deserve support, and not just on the big day.

These are the kinds of support that I have been able to provide for my clients in the past:

Prenatal

Knowing what all the local options are for prenatal care and planning for birth. Calming fears is another thing I do to support my clients in the prenatal period, and this comes in many forms, but most often through education. I also find myself supporting clients prenatally by connecting them with trusted professionals. This can be for all kinds of things including prenatal massage, chiropractic, and more. I also am happy to share my shopping tips when clients are looking for specific things!

Birth

As a doula, during birth I am giving physical support by helping my clients move around. I give hand massages and help keep their gown closed as we walk the halls. I also like to say that I help clients ask more questions about their care. This is part of helping them know what all their options are as well. I like to say that sometimes I help them order off the secret menu of options that aren’t necessarily the norm, but are perfectly fine to request.

One area that I wish I could support birthing families better here is during cesarean surgeries. All families deserve support, and it can be so hard for families when their plans go sideways. In many other places in the United States, they allow doulas in the operating room as a second support person. Doulas are even trained in how to behave inside an operating room, and how to support clients having a cesarean. Doulas are not currently allowed in operating room of all our local hospitals, but maybe we can change that in the future.

Postpartum: direction to proper resources & support!!

The most important thing that I can do for birth doula clients is to direct them to the people who are actual experts in the things that they are dealing with in the moment. If they have questions about breastfeeding, I make sure I send them to an International Board Certified Lactation Consultant. That is just one example, but knowing WHO to ask questions is really important. Breastfeeding is a great example because so many people don’t really understand how little training most physicians have in breastfeeding science, and they end up getting non-evidence-based advice despite best intentions by everyone involved. Part of my job as a doula is helping clients connect to the right people for whatever questions they might have. I don’t always have the answers, but I do make it my business to know who to send you to.

I have not had the capacity to serve postpartum clients this year, but VERY soon, I am going to have an announcement coming, so be on the lookout for that in early 2020!

All families deserve the support of a doula. Part of my job is helping insure you get the right support at the right time from the right people. I’m constantly learning, so I can continue to know the best local and online resources for my clients.

What was the most helpful resource you found to help you after you brought your new baby home?

Midwives in Southwest Indiana?

Evansville needs midwives to support healthy birthing families!

Southwest Indiana needs midwives, and the lack of them here is surprising. It is frustrating for me as a doula for several reasons. Our area deserves to have midwifery options, especially as midwifery care has proven benefits for patient satisfaction, cost, and birth outcomes.

What does the landscape look like for people searching for midwifery care here? We currently have two Certified Professional Midwives that travel here for home births, one from Bedford and the other from Bloomington. However, home birth is not an option for everyone. In 2019, we only have one Certified Nurse Midwife catching babies at one Evansville area hospital.

So what is the big deal? Midwives are experts in normal pregnancy and birth. According to the Midwives Alliance of North America “all midwives are trained to provide comprehensive prenatal care and education, guide labor and birth, address complications, and care for newborns.” Midwives are not surgeons, and all obstetricians are, which fundamentally changes the way that they approach your care. The Midwifery Model of Care “whether practiced in clinics, private homes, hospitals or birth centers, has at its core the characteristics of being with women, listening to women, and sharing knowledge and decision-making with women” (MANA). Midwives expect pregnancy and birth to be normal and watch out for signs that pregnancy, labor, and delivery might need intervention. That is not the same approach as an Obstetrician, and if you want to read more about the comparison or some social science research about this I highly recommend this book and especially this article and this one too from Robbie Davis-Floyd. She is the most renowned anthropological expert when it comes to this stuff!

Midwives have also been proven time and time again to be linked to better outcomes for their patients. People who use midwives for their care are THREE TIMES more likely to be satisfied with their care when compared with obstetrician-led care. Midwifery care has also been shown to be the most cost effective care in the hospital setting.

Who cares? Well, I do, and I’m not alone. I chose midwifery care for myself when I delivered my babies in Cleveland. As a doula, I regularly get asked for recommendations about providers, and I can’t even count the number of disappointed people I have talked to when I tell them that there is only one midwife here in town available to catch babies in one hospital. There are plenty of factors that go into choosing a provider, including insurance, location, practice style, personality, and so much more. While one midwife is certainly better than none, people choosing to birth here surely deserve more options. We need more midwives in Southwest Indiana.

For a little comparison, just down the road in Owensboro, KY there are 4 Certified Nurse Midwives catching babies at the hospital. Owensboro has a population of around 60,000. Evansville has a population of >115,000! If we include the populations of the surrounding 5 counties (Gibson, Posey, Spencer, Vanderburgh, & Warrick) We have a local population of over 320,000 people, and we know that there are people traveling here from Northern Kentucky, Eastern Illinois, and even further counties in Indiana to give birth, and they aren’t even included in that population count! Not every pregnancy and birth here needs to be attended by a surgeon. Yes, family practice physicians are also an excellent option, and there are some great ones here, but midwifery care is more specialized and has a different approach than the medical model of birth.

Southwest Indiana needs midwives, and we have some currently working to complete their training. As I sit writing this I know three midwives who are currently in school and planning to practice here when they graduate. Two will be Certified Nurse Midwives who catch babies in the hospital and one will be a Certified Professional Midwife who attends home births. Growing families deserve options for their care, and these midwives will be an amazing addition to our community when they are finished with their training. I can’t wait for the day when birthing families in Southwest Indiana have more midwives to support them as they grow.

Have you ever considered hiring a midwife instead of a physician for your pregnancy, birth, and postpartum care?

Pregnancy Pains

Nausea, exhaustion, sciatica, oh my!

Pregnancy is not always sweet smiles, glowing skin, and thick beautiful hair, sometimes it is vomiting multiple times a day, exhaustion and shooting pains down the back of your leg when you move. In today’s blog post I want to be real about pregnancy and give a few tips for what you can do for these 3 specific things: nausea, exhaustion, & sciatica. These were my 3 biggest complaints as a pregnant person, and I honestly want people to know that you are not a whiner if you are experiencing these 3 things and don’t know what to do. I want to give you practical tips for taking care of these on your own and how to know when to seek out help. 

My first pregnancy complaint was nausea. I hate that we call it “morning sickness” when it honestly can last all day long. Most people experience the greatest nausea in the first trimester, but I got really lucky to be able to experience it until I was 25-ish weeks. I certainly know it could have been worse; hyperemesis gravidarum is no joke! My best tips for getting through nausea are to keep healthy high protein snacks on hand, drink plenty of water, and don’t let your stomach ever be empty. If you are having acid reflux or heartburnissues, I always like to recommend papaya enzymes, which can be found at most health food stores locally in a chewable form and for not much money. If you are having trouble keeping any food down and are experiencing symptoms of dehydration, talk to you provider about other things that might be helpful, which can include medications. 

Exhaustion for me personally was a big problem as well. I was in graduate school while pregnant both times. Naps were honestly the very best thing for me, but they aren’t always possible when you are working and/or taking care of other kids. I get that. Sometimes even when you get a full 8 hours of sleep, growing a human takes all the energy you have and you don’t have any extra left to give by the end of the day. I always like to recommend getting up and moving around to give yourself an energy jolt. Stretch your legs. Get some fresh air. Splash cold water on your face. Some people drink a little caffeine, but you’ll want to figure out what works best for your situation.

Finally, I want to talk about sciatica. Have you ever moved just to have a pain shoot from the very top of your leg all the way down the back of your leg to your foot. That is sciatica. I suffered with sciatica during both of my pregnancies, and I personally found stretching and a regular yoga practice to be the most effective ways to keep the sciatica away.  

We have some really amazing local options for prenatal yoga that I know and trust! Having spoken with the instructors for these 3 different courses I can tell you that they know what they are doing, are trained, knowledgeable, and compassionate instructors who can help you relieve some of those aches and pains as well as helping reinforce that mind-body connection.

YMCA Prenatal Yoga

Evansville Yoga Center

The Women’s Hospital

If your pain persists or worsens, it is always a great idea to speak to your provider and they may even refer you to a physical therapist who can help you. 

The best news I can tell you is that for most of these pregnancy pains, there is a cure: birth. The best way to get rid of pregnancy induced anything, is to not be pregnant anymore, and that happens to everyone eventually. I won’t even tell you that you have to enjoy your pregnancy. Pains like this certainly can make pregnancy really unbearable, but I promise that hating the process of growing a baby inside of your body does NOT make you a bad parent. You can love your baby without loving the pains of pregnancy. 

Want more personalized tips for getting through your pregnancy pains and local resources? Contact us today for an interview.

The Induction Discussion

Ask good questions & know your options!

Induction of labor has been a very hot topic in the birth world, most especially since a huge study published in August 2018 seemed to say that if we just induce everyone’s labor, it will help reduce the cesarean rate. If you are a super geek like me, you can read the actual study here, along with Henci Goer’s full critique and dissection here, and the California Maternal Quality Care Collaborative message about how to apply this study to medical practice here. Long story short: no, that is not actually what that study said and the circumstances that those included in the study had are NOT what most people are looking at when it comes to induction. I know academic discussions are not everyone’s cup of tea, and that is not the purpose of this post. I want to talk about ways that you can approach the induction discussion with your provider. 

I would be remiss if I didn’t start with a little information about induction. There are 2 basic reasons that people choose to be induced: Medical and Elective. A medical induction means that there is a medical reason that it would be better for your baby to be born instead of continuing your pregnancy. There are plenty of important reasons that induction exists for the safety of parents and babies including high blood pressure, high levels of protein in your urine, blood sugar issues due to gestational diabetes, and many more. Some people choose to be induced for all kinds of reasons like family flying in from out of town, pain from the end of pregnancy, a history of very fast labors, and many more. Induction is forcing your body and baby to get the process started before they are ready, so it isn’t always fast, ESPECIALLY the 1st time. There are all kinds of ways to induce labor medically, though providers typically have a way that they like to get things rolling depending on what is already going on with your body. 

What I really want everyone to do, is to have an informed discussion with their provider about induction. The old saying goes that if you don’t know your options, you don’t have any, and that is also true for induction. I always encourage everyone to have an open and honest conversation with your provider, ask great questions, know your options, and know the evidence for those options. 

Here are 6 questions that might help you start the induction discussion with your provider: 

  1. Why are you recommending induction? 

Some providers recommend everyone be induced at 39 weeks. Some providers only recommend induction for medical reasons. Asking why is a great way to start the conversation and communicate your preferences about whether or not you want to be induced.  

2. Can you tell me what my Bishop Score is? 

A Bishop Score is used to help rate the readiness of your cervix for induction of labor using five different measurements. How open is your cervix (dilation)? How soft is your cervix (consistency)? Is it pointed toward your back, middle, or front (position)? How thin is it (effacement)? How far down in your pelvis is baby right now (station)? All of this adds up to the score that will tell you how likely it is that you will deliver vaginally if induced. A score of 8 or more means you are favorable for induction. (Please note: this score is NOT a guarantee!!!) 

3. What is your recommendation for how this induction will start and proceed? 

Most inductions start with a medication to soften your cervix and get it ready. There are 2 medications that they use for this. Cervidil is essentially like a tiny tampon (with a string and all) that they place next to your cervix. Cytotec is a tiny pill that is cut into smaller portions and can be given three different ways: placed next to your cervix, swallowed, or allowed to dissolve under your tongue. You can read more about these drugs here and here if you would like. 

After your cervix is ripe there are different options to proceed, and you may want to discuss things like: a foley bulb for opening your cervix mechanically, your feelings about artificially breaking your water, pitocin for getting contractions going. These are all options that should be considered beforehand so you can be an active and informed participant in your care. 

4. Are there alternatives to what you are suggesting? 

As with most things, providers have a way that they normally do things, this is their job after all. Sometimes there are alternatives that are not always presented. For example, some people get their contractions going using nipple stimulation for a release of natural oxytocin. This is something that you will want to talk to your healthcare provider about before you just start trying to do it at home though. Not everyone wants to know all the options, so providers sometimes shorthand the discussion. By asking this question you show that you are curious and trying to have an open conversation with them.  

5. Will you be there? 

You spent 9 months getting to know your provider, and some people honestly choose to be induced to ensure that their provider will be the one who is present at delivery. I completely respect that. I think that part of the induction conversation always should include knowing who is going to be there and what their schedule looks like. (BTW: one of the nice things about having a doula is that no matter if you get induced or not, you will know and have spent time with at least one of the people in your birthing space.)

6. What kind of timeline are we looking at for this? 

Scheduling things is great, and managing expectations for induction is also important. What I see most often locally is people admitted to the hospital in the evening for cervical ripening and then the active portion of the induction starts in the morning. If you don’t need cervical ripening, then often you are asked to arrive in the morning to begin the process. Induction can be quick, but it isn’t always. You will want to know what happens if your provider goes home and who will be overseeing the induction and possibly the delivery then. If they break your water, do you have a deadline for delivery?   Will you be allowed to eat and drink at all during your induction? 

As with every decision regarding your care, you will want to use your B.R.A.I.N. as a starting point for any interventions. Talk about the Benefits, Risks, and Alternatives. Also check in to see what your Intuition is telling you, and don’t forget to ask what happens if we do Nothing! Induction doesn’t have to be scary and you also shouldn’t be afraid to say no if you don’t want to do it without it being medically necessary. Only you can decide what is right for your situation, and I promise that as your doula I only want you to have the best information to make an informed decision and I will support you unflinchingly and with all the encouragement you require. 

3 Evansville Dates to Go on While You Are Still Pregnant

Fun ways to connect with your partner in the EVV before baby arrives!

The end of pregnancy can be really challenging. You might be uncomfortable with a baby kicking your bladder and sending you to the bathroom 5x an hour. You might be anxious wondering when labor is going to start. Maybe you are counting down the days until your induction and hoping things get going before then. You might be hot and hormonal and ready to not be pregnant anymore, and staring at the full moon wishing the old wives tales were right. (The next full moon will be Friday September 13th, in case you were wondering.) Instead of wishing the end of your pregnancy away, I want to give you three fun dates to go on in Evansville while you are still pregnant.

  1. First Fridays at Haynie’s Corner are so much fun and filled with art, music, all kinds of local businesses, food trucks, and sometimes even some shenanigans! I always make sure to stop by Sixth Street Soapery even if only for the amazing smells and to see Mary Allen’s smile! Walk down and grab some lemonade next to the fountain and listen to some live music. Peruse some local art and if you get hungry there are food trucks and all kinds of great spots to sit like Sauced and Walton’s International Comfort Food. If your feet are feeling swollen and you are sick of waddling around, you can even hitch a ride on an Evansville Pedicab to rest and still feel the wind in your hair. The First Friday of every warm month, this is where it is at, so check out the Haynie’s Corner Arts District page if you want to find more cool stuff going on in this little slice of fun in Evansville.
  2. If you’d like to still get out of the house and do something fun with your partner, but maybe not with such a crowd, perhaps you would consider a cooking class at Thyme in the Kitchen. You could sit a while at White Swan Coffee Lab, get a sweet treat at Milk and Sugar Scoop Shoppe, then stroll around window shopping along Franklin St. This date gives you and your partner time to connect doing things together, learning, and talking about whatever comes to mind. Connecting to your partner is such a great thing to do before a baby gets thrown in the mix and things get more complicated.
  3. Maybe events aren’t your thing at all, and you’d prefer a quieter evening out with your partner. If you love movies and being waited on like the Royalty that you are, my husband and I LOVE treating ourselves to a movie at Royal Suite. No, they won’t pause the movie for you, so definitely don’t pick a long one, BUT they will bring you food when you push a button and that is pretty great. Bonus: their seats recline and you can elevate your feet! When we’re feeling really wild, afterwards we pick up some snacks at Aihua International Market and head down for a stroll on the Evansville Riverfront Park. There might even be some kids playing at Mickey’s Kingdom Playground and you can join them in a swing just for fun! Having a bit of fun together before your baby comes is a great way to connect as a couple.

Connection is an important thing in any partnership, and marking the passage of major milestones, or even in anticipation of them, is a great thing to do. You don’t have to spend a ton of money on a giant vacation to connect with your honey before you give birth. After the baby arrives, life shifts, and making sure your relationship foundation is solid before you start rocking it is a great thing! Dates are one of my favorite ways to connect with my partner, and making time for them isn’t always easy, but is always important.

What are your favorite things to do around Evansville at the end of pregnancy? What special plans are you making with your partner for before baby arrives?

Things Doulas Know

Unsolicited advice is not my style

I have stopped giving random advice to pregnant people that do not ask for it, essentially for two reasons. The first reason has to do with other people and the second because of me.

  1. Everyone seems to feel entitled to give pregnant people advice, and I do not want to add to the mostly annoying cacophony.

I do not know what it is about pregnancy that makes everyone feel like they need to give you advice and tell you what to do. I know that most everyone really means well, but holy moly it can be really exhausting to be constantly bombarded by people who think they know better than you about what you should do. I won’t even get started on the horror stories that people feel obligated to tell you like they can’t stop the flow of awfulness spewing from their mouths. I have a strict no spreading trauma policy when it comes to speaking to pregnant people, and I highly encourage all clients to tune out any and all negative messages surrounding birth and parenthood, especially while you are extra vulnerable and pumped up full of hormones!

2. I know way more than most people about pregnancy, birth, babies, etc than most people, and I have a tendency to go on and on about it.

I know a ton of really specific and sometimes seemingly random things that can really help people who are navigating pregnancy, planning for their upcoming birth, and getting prepared to take care of a new tiny human too. I am happy to talk about all these things all day long, and I do quite a bit, BUT not everyone wants to hear that. I respect people’s wishes and only expose my super birth geek side when requested.

As a doula and childbirth educator, I have extensively studied pregnancy, birth, and postpartum. I know where to find great evidence-based and unbiased information. I know different comfort techniques to get through labor and delivery. I make sure to keep up on all the local resources for new families in our area including great breastfeeding support services, chiropractors who specialize in the Webster technique, prenatal yoga classes, which physicians will provide parallel care for home birth, support for victims of abuse, stores that sell green baby products, and more. I am seriously committed to life-long learning and I want to help everyone be better connected with the resources and information that they need.

I never want people to feel afraid to ask me questions. I would rather my clients ask me anything rather than sit around worrying or wondering. I make an effort to not overshare or overwhelm people. I am always happy to answer questions, especially for my clients. BUT, I can’t send you answers that you don’t ask for, and I won’t, not because I’m protecting the information, rather because I know it is really hard to sip from a fire hose and it has taken me YEARS to gather all this information that you are trying to digest in 40-ish weeks.

What was the worst unsolicited advice you ever received about birth?

My Goals as Your Doula

As a doula, I listen and follow your lead.

  1. Support you and your family how you want to be supported.

End of list.

Yes, seriously.

As a doula, I listen and follow your lead. If you want information about anything pregnancy or birth related, I am happy to help you find great and unbiased information about all your options. I love answering pregnancy and birth questions, but make a big effort not to inject my opinion into any of it. That is because my opinion about what you should do is pretty much irrelevant. I do not tell people what to do, and completely understand that there is no one right way that works for every birthing family and every situation.

Most people only think of the physical support a doula can offer, and that is certainly part of the job description, but it definitely is not all of it. I hold space for my clients to give them room to think things through and listen to their gut without an audience. I talk through tough decisions and help you get to the root of your desires for your birth. I am an empathetic ear when you are frustrated, excited, anxious, worried, elated, exhausted, etc. I also don’t have ALL the answers, but I am really great at helping people wade through the sea of information out there to find excellent sources and resources too.

In my 5+ years as a doula, my practice has certainly changed, but my #1 goal has always been steadfast, and I don’t ever imagine it will change! I have no agenda for your birth; I only want your family to feel fully supported as you would like to be. I truly strive to check any bias I might carry and leave it outside of the space of your blossoming family.

Would you like to have an extremely knowledgeable, experienced, and compassionate person in your contact list and at your birth? If you said yes, then I would love to talk to you about birth doula services!

Doula? A do what now?

Midwives and doulas have very different jobs!

One of the most common misconceptions that I run into as a doula is that people think that we are the same as midwives. While I have worked with some really great midwives in my time as a doula, and LOVED having midwives catch my own 2 babies, I do not want to be a midwife or be confused for one. Doula care can compliment midwifery care very well, but we certainly do not replace a midwife.

As a doula, I do a whole lot of things that can improve your pregnancy, labor, delivery, and immediate postpartum. I help you ask more (and sometimes better or more specific) questions prenatally and think through all those decisions about what you want for your delivery before it is actually the big day. I help you practice different comfort techniques and even help you know exactly what things you actually need to have for your birth and immediate postpartum period either at the hospital or home. I hold hands and help people move around, sometimes with all kinds of wires attached to them. I push on your lower back, squeeze your hips, and massage your hands during labor. I help you to the bathroom and comfort you through the challenges of labor and deliver with all kinds of affirming words. I will let you squeeze my hand and listen to the changes in your voice and demeanor for clues on how I can better help you. I do not doula the same for any two births, as each one presents its own unique set of circumstances.

Midwives provide care for healthy pregnant people prenatally, during labor and delivery, and postpartum. They approach birth differently than an Obstetrician, but essentially do all the medical things an OB can do other than surgery. Midwives view birth as a normal process and often practice watchful waiting while expecting everything to be perfectly normal and fine instead of trying to prevent things from going wrong through action. It can seem a very subtle difference in philosophy, and not all midwives take this approach, but this is the midwifery approach generally to pregnancy and birth.

  • A short and completely non-comprehensive list of things a midwife can do that I do not as a doula:
  • Check your vital signs like blood pressure and temperature
  • Order labs
  • See you for in-office prenatal visits (monthly, biweekly, then weekly)
  • Check your cervix
  • Catch your baby
  • Give you stitches
  • Check your fundal height after delivery
  • Order and administer medication

If you want to learn more about midwives, this link is a good place to start.

If you would like to learn more about doulas, you can read about us here. I would also LOVE to talk to you about my services! You can contact me through this website, via email, phone, or message me on social media–whatever you are comfortable with is fine with me. You can read reviews from previous clients and check my availability at this link as well if you would like.

I love helping my clients navigate pregnancy, birth, and postpartum, and have more than five years of experience as a doula at both hospital and home births. I have worked with some amazing midwives and OBs too. I have been to 8 different hospitals as a doula and learned all about their policies and who has which equipment. I know which cabinets have the towels and where to find the emesis basins. More than that though, I support my clients however they want to be supported, because each one is different and each situation demands different techniques and approaches.

Someone once asked me what the #1 most important quality is for a good doula. That was easy for me to answer: EMPATHY! What I may lack in midwifery clinical skills, I make up for in compassion and listening skills. Midwives and doulas can work really well together and there is definitely room for both in your chosen birthing space!

Ask Questions!

As humans, we like to ask questions. As patients, we are often not encouraged to do so. That is a problem. You are in charge of your body. You are in charge of what happens to it. That means that nobody gets to do things to you without you saying yes; that’s bodily autonomy. You deserve to be given true information to make the best decision possible for you and your family. As a doula, I encourage my clients to inform themselves as best they can and find a provider that they trust to be able to have open and honest conversations about your care.

Misinformation can spread like wildfire, and you have to be mindful about who you are getting your information from, even when you might trust the source for other things. Just because your mother gave birth 25 years ago does not mean that she is up on all the latest evidence regarding birth practices. Just because your neighbor had a fantastic planned cesarean does not mean that committing to major surgery is what is right for you or guarantee that you will have similarly easy outcomes. The point is this: question the source and motives of anyone giving you information!

This is a short list of things I often hear about that are NOT TRUE:

  • Once a cesarean, always a cesarean. (VBAC is an option!)
  • Everyone should be induced at 39 weeks. (Nope)
  • If they think your baby is big, you have to schedule an induction or cesarean surgery. (Nope)
  • Induction is no big deal. (Not always)
  • Laying flat on your back is the best pushing position. (Not according to the evidence)
  • You are in “active labor” at 4cms. (Not since 2010)
  • There are no risks to getting an epidural. (Not true)
  • Doulas are judge-y jerks who only help people who want to go without medication! (not me) I could honestly write a whole post about ideas about doulas that are wrong, but that is for a different day.
  • Home birth is not a safe option. (There is plenty of evidence to say it is.)

The truth is that everyone you ask for their advice is informed by their own knowledge and experience. Your great-grandma may have LOVED being asleep for the birth of her children, but that just isn’t how most people choose to birth anymore. Your doctor may have had a string of 3 traumatic deliveries that they attended in the week before your appointment. Your sister may have had a medical condition that necessitated her induction. You need to make sure to temper any opinions you get with unbiased information too, and then figure out what you would like to do using the BRAIN method:

  • Benefits–Why are you suggesting this intervention?
  • Risks–Is there anything negative that could happen?
  • Alternatives–Are there other options available?
  • Intuition–What is your gut saying you should do?
  • Nothing–What happens if you do nothing?

That last one is REALLY important to remember. If nobody is in danger, it is perfectly prudent to ask for more TIME! Sometimes doing nothing is a perfectly reasonable option, and you are well within your rights to say no to interventions being offered in a non-emergent situation. Even when a non-emergent intervention such as a cesarean needs to be done, it is also perfectly ok to ask for a few moments to gather your thoughts and prepare your mind for what is to come. Though some do, not all necessary cesareans need to RUN to the operating room, and a massive shift in plans can be a bit easier to stomach if you have a moment to wrap your head around it before it happens.

The Rights of Childbearing Women is a great place to start when thinking about what you might want to question. You are not a bad patient for asking questions! Some people prefer to have a provider who tells them what to do, and that is ok too by the way, but if you prefer to have a provider who is open to communicating with you and explaining their reasoning for recommendations, I HIGHLY recommend checking out your options and knowing that you may have the option of switching providers for any reason and at ANY time. Providers all have different styles, and finding one who fits with your style is a GOOD thing. Not all providers are created equal, and sadly there are providers who are less than honest in their recommendations. Trust your gut! Don’t be afraid to speak up, ask questions, and switch if you feel like your provider is trying to push you into something you are uncomfortable with and isn’t necessary, including using coercive techniques to persuade you.

If you want to do research, here are some trusted sources for good information that I send to my clients:

If you are a childbirth professional and you want to learn more about your clients’ rights in childbirth, you can check out Birth Monopoly’s Know Your Rights course designed specifically for us in mind.